Wednesday, August 15, 2007

source of all evil: commercials

Wilson runs a nail factory and decides his business needs a bit of advertising. He asks a well-known advertising agency to make a TV ad for his nail factory. After a week the marketing executive shows up with a recording of and ad with the following content:

A roman soldier is busy nailing Jesus to a cross.
The soldier turns to face the camera, and with a grin,
says: “Use Wilson’s Nails, they’ll hold anything.”

Wilson, astonished, shouts: “What is the matter with you? They’ll never show that on TV. Can't you make an ad without Romans crucifying Jesus?!?”
Another week goes by and the marketing man returns with another tape:

This time the camera pans the Roman standing with his arms folded looking up at Jesus on the cross. The Roman peers into the camera lens and says: “Wilson’s Nails. They’ll hold anything”.

Wilson is beside himself. “You just don’t get it yet. I DO NOT want anything with Jesus on a cross! Listen, I’ll give you one last chance. Come back in one week with an advertisement that I can broadcast.”
Wilson waits impatiently. The marketing executive arrives a week later, as ordered, and puts the new video into the VCR:

A naked man, with long hair, gasping for breath, is running across a field. About a dozen Roman soldiers, coming over the hill, are hot on his trail. One of the soldiers turns to the camera and says: “If only we had used Wilson’s Nails.”